October 15th, 2024 – Greetings from Pittsburgh, PA, where my son is a sophomore at Pitt this year and just loves it. I love it, too!
A scene from a rainy hike in Schenley Park on Monday 🙂
Current musings:
It’s funny how the universe works, isn’t it?
Thanks to using The CALM Method, I was wonderfully early to the Austin airport for my flight to Pittsburgh via Chicago (which, spoiler! was 3 hrs delayed) so I had ample time to walk the terminal to get more steps (forever slaving to the Fitbit!).
It occurred to me that I wanted to get a lil’ Austin-inspired giftie for my son’s girlfriend’s mom to give her in Pittsburgh. Since I was so early, I had the luxury of CALM-ly perusing the shelves at a little shop. I found the perfect wavy-gravy “Keep Austin Weird” mug and bought it, along with the ubiquitous Hershey bar (WITH almonds duhhh!) (a must-have when I fly…).
As I was walking out of the little shop, I noticed a wire stand selling shiny new books. Mind you, I already had a fiction and a non-fiction selection stashed in my carry-on…but…new books are so pretty!
There was a very YELLOW cover that caught my eye not necessarily for the brightness of it, but instead, the title, which featured one of my favorite words:
FOCUS.
It was called The FOCUS Project by Erik Qualman (self-named “Equalman”, his alter ego superhero). The full title? The Focus Project: the not-so-simple art of doing less.
Well, he had me at “Focus” and then slam-dunked me at “Project”!
Me: “Yes! I WILL impulse-purchase this book, right here, right now.” Hello, business expense!
(Notice the aforementioned unrelenting taskmaster Fitbit)
The well-versed productivity book nut that I am, I’d JUST FINISHED listening to Kendra Adachi’s latest, The Plan. (4 stars!) Full title: The Plan: Manage your time like a Lazy Genius.
Arriving at my gate, I dove into the yellowness and was hooked immediately.
Curious? Well…let me share!
Here goes: the premise of this book is that in order to accomplish more, you need to dial into your FOCUS more, (not earth-shattering, I know), but ALSO, (and this is the kicker) you need to adamantly say NO a whole lot more than you currently are. “NO” can also mean “not now” FYI, but you’ve gotta say it way more than you are comfortable with! (LESS is MORE, remember?)
You can’t disagree that working multiple parallel projects means most of them never get finished. BOOM.
So, what’s the answer?
Laser focus.
When you laser focus, which we all admit is a moving target and very difficult to accomplish on the regular, everything else that isn’t the object of your focus, is irrelevant, unnecessary, and only serves as a DISTRACTION.
When you laser focus, progress and flow are inevitable.
YES, PLEASE! But, HOW????
Here’s how you do it:
In order to open up time and energy for this wonderful FOCUS-to-be, you MUST repeatedly say: “no, not now, no thanks, I’m not able to do that, I’m doing other things”…politely-ish of course.
Let’s practice on Overwhelma, why don’t we?? PS we do NOT have to be polite to that &!^@#!!
Coworker: Hey, can you pick up an extra shift for me tomorrow? You: (unless you are super-strapped for cash…) No, I’m not available to.
Neighbor: Hey, can you watch my dog at your house again when we are gone? She loved it over there so much… You: No, I’m not available to.
Friend: I know you love books so wouldn’t you love to join a book club I’m starting? You: No, I’m not available to.
Captain: We are short on players, could you join our team this season? You: No, I’m not available to.
Board Member: Hey, we need someone to head up this new committee, can you do it? You: No, I’m not available to.
Teacher: Hey, since it’s your 3rd kid and you know the ropes, want to be room parent? You: No, I’m not available to.
Want to, can you, would you, you should, you could, you might…????
There’s a GREAT saying: if it’s not a “hell, yes!” then it’s a hard NO!
If you’re anything like me, it’s so hard! I’d rather just say yes to someone’s face and then quietly never bring it up again. But then it just eats at your energy.
No energy leaks!
Let’s visualize our “Focus Armor”! It’s our Power Pose (have you read about the power posing and how it physically boosts your mind?)
When we don our Focus Armor, we can say NO like a Superhero! And then, more time and energy to FOCUS is right around the corner.
Let’s borrow the classic breakup line “it’s not you, it’s me” shall we?
It’s not you; it’s my schedule.
It’s not you; it’s my weirdness.
It’s not you; it’s just something I’m working on.
In fact, truth bomb: you don’t have to explain at all.
Actually, I bet that the minute you say, “Oh, gosh, no, but thanks for asking!” that person’s thinks, “Oh, I love that she said that! She’s so focused!”
Shall we be FOCUS Superheroes together?? Email me here and tell me something you’re going to say NO to!
Come practice your “no” with our amazing accountability group!
