A thank you to someone I’ll never be able to directly thank (a tale of perspective)

Mar 24, 2020 | Ryan's Blog

Old Hag or Fair Maiden?

March 24, 2020 — I woke up really “off” this morning, partially because I had some really weird anxious dreams which I won’t upset you with, but also with some random leg pains. So, my normal morning joy was a bit compromised as I sat down with my gratitude journal and a lovely cup of coffee in my comfy chair.

Luckily, with all this “new” time we currently have on our hands, I am less concerned with judging my energy or mood, because the day ahead is simple: staying at home instead of rat-racing around doing a million unimportant things. What a change in perspective from a short 2 weeks ago.

I want to share another radical alteration of perspective I had a few short months ago.

This past January as I started the new decade, I turned the big FIVE-OH. Yep. No one loves a big birthday like that, let’s be honest, but I wasn’t overly dreading it. But I wasn’t jumping up and down excited about it either. When I think back to when I turned 30 and 40, I sought to honor each decade beginning my life’s new phases. (and truth be told, I usually mentally frown upon others who vocalize such dread about 30 and 40-don’t you? oh those foolish babes!)

But, approaching 50, I definitely experienced more of those “50 is the true start of OLD” thoughts. Thanks to greeting cards of black balloons, being almost 11 months older than my hubby, and ribbing from BOTH my big AND little brothers (it’s their job, I get it!), it was easy to go there and think, O.L.D.

So, I went to yoga class on the Monday before my actual birthday, and the teacher went around the room to check in with each of us. When he got to me I said, “Wellllllll, this time next week I’ll be (drama here)…50” Obviously I was expecting (and clearly inviting) some reactions from fellow attendees in the tone of “welcome to the old club, you poor thing” type stuff, but what I heard instead rocked me in a such beautiful way:

Someone sighed out, “Ohhhhh…fifty….”

Like it was 21, or 25 or 29 or something super YOUNG.

Right then, in that micro-moment, I cast off that “50 is the start of being old” shizz and donned the “50 is freaking YOUNG!!! Let’s do this!!!” True story.

I will never know who gave me that amazing gift of perspective change. I would like to thank her with a huge hug (assuming we will be able to hug strangers ever again!) because what a GIFT.

Whenever I grumble, ache, or look at what I still want to accomplish in my life and think, “if only I’d gotten started 10 years ago on…[this business, this project, this relationship with myself] I would be able to do so much more…” I channel that mysterious, generous voice in the yoga studio:


Let’s do this staycation thing. The earth, the universe, whatever you believe, is TELLING YOU SOMETHING.

Listen. Hear. Act.

Don’t overthink it. Just invite the space to move the needle forward on something you couldn’t possibly imagine doing in between mom-taxi, demanding work travel, caring for everyone but yourself, over-volunteering, whatever!

I bet you signed up for at least one program to do SOMETHING fun, important, whimsical, introspective or collaborative but then lost touch with it. I have a LONG list of those too.

Pick one! Log in. Just play and explore. I’d love to hear about it if you want to share! I’m here to cheer us on:)

Ryan 🙂


My name is Ryan…

I love teaching people how to let go of the crazy and live a less stressful life. My book The CALM Method: A Guide to Ditch Last-Minute Living is full of guidance and tips for you, but the real magic is in our community. The Find FOCUS Membership is a great place to get more done alongside your peeps!!!

Less Chaos? Yes, Please!

Learn the CALM Method for getting out of the house on time and with less chaos.