Macauley Culkin had it so good…

Mar 17, 2021 | Ryan's Blog

March 16, 2020 — If you take Quarantine, the pandemic, social distancing from the rest of the world, online schooling AKA remote learning, and no travel for the hubby, that adds up to everyone being at home practically all the time.

Eating all the time. Making more than a few messes. Occupying all the rooms.

Did I mention EATING ALL THE TIME?!?

It’s had its benefits, yes. *but that’s not what this blog post is all about*

And I know it’s not overly crowded at my house, compared to what it could be. I’m super spoiled. For sure. I admit it.

But, hey, this girl just needs to BE ALONE in her house for a period of time. PLEASE!!!!

Not for any particular activity. But for the sake of being solo and accountable to no one.

They get to hole up in their rooms. They get alone time. Hours and hours and HOURS.

My turn.

At last, the opportunity arose!!! Wooot! Hubby and soon-to-be-high school graduate were headed off to do the college visit thing!

Once I realized that with just a little planning, I could encourage (read: REQUIRE) my youngest to go do something, somewhere else, with other people…ooooooh, drooling!


I had to orchestrate it a bit. A lot, actually.

As it is with teenaged boys, their plans are as dependable as dandelions floating on the breeze. But I persevered.

I definitely had to work for it. Driving kids places when I didn’t really want to or hadn’t planned to.

Trying to be pleasant for that lead up time was nearly impossible. (And I didn’t really succeed, either.)

Then I felt bad. Did they understand that it wasn’t about THEM? That I still loved them but 100% needed some “absence makes the heart grow fonder” time?

Please, just go! Please, and SOON.

It’s me, not you.

But then it happened. The stars aligned AT LAST! Alone with me, myself and I!!!

Time to dance like no one’s watching…except on TikTok.

‘Twas so good.

My food choices, my music choices, my movie choice. MEEEEEEEE all me.

Not. Sorry.

If you’re needing something like this, DO IT. If it’s not an option to get totally alone, then find a room, take provisions, and hang out a sign that says, NOT AVAILABLE.

It could likely take lots of prep, but it will be worth it. Use the CALM Method.


They will like the you that comes out afterwards! You will be filled and contented. You will be able to get back to the regular role of fortifying the fort, fighting all the fires and feeding all the faces.

(that was some off the CHAIN alliteration, y’all!)

They’ll get used to it. They might even get to the point where they say, “Hey, Mom, seems like it’s time for you hang out your ‘NOT AVAILABLE’ sign again…”

Wouldn’t that just BLOW your mind?? That they would start to recognize how helpful it is that you take self-care time because it makes you better? That helps stabilize the ship.

We all know that the mamas are keeping that ship sailing. Which is a TON of work. Sometimes she, the Captain, needs to stretch out on the sunniest deck with a glass of something cool and refreshing, and feel the breezes. And do nothing else but ENJOY.

(wearing sunscreen of course)

No apologies.

FYI you are AMAZING. Every single day!

Ryan 🙂


My name is Ryan…

I love teaching people how to let go of the crazy and live a less stressful life. My book The CALM Method: A Guide to Ditch Last-Minute Living is full of guidance and tips for you, but the real magic is in our community. The Find FOCUS Membership is a great place to get more done alongside your peeps!!!

Less Chaos? Yes, Please!

Learn the CALM Method for getting out of the house on time and with less chaos.